I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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