I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
