i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
