Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize