A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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