My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
