So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize