it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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