There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
