he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
third nipple confirmed
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
