so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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