He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
