As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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