Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
