i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
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