People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
