It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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