I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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