What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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