We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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