i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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