Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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