Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
