i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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