I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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