so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
