Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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