Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
