Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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