I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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