Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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