it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
