Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
