If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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