yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
