hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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