For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
