your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
