Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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