Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
