we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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