just tell him i said nine months
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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