Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize