R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
