I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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