from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
We need to get me chipped asap
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
