i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
