Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
