We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I will be naked everywhere
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
