Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
