ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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