just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
