member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
